


Smaug the Mighty Hunter

by JamieHasCatEyes, TheMightyFlynn



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Art, Gen, Please Don't Hate Me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-05-09
Packaged: 2018-06-07 08:04:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6795985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JamieHasCatEyes/pseuds/JamieHasCatEyes, https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMightyFlynn/pseuds/TheMightyFlynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Baby Smaug prepares to make his first kill.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Smaug the Mighty Hunter

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is what happens when I'm bored and procrastinating over writing fics that I really should be focussing on. There was a picture posted on a Facebook page that my friend and I run together. It was of an Indonesian snake that had been coloured red with the caption "Baby Smaug". We started joking that we should write the fic, then my friend drew the picture, so I figured why the hell not? The result is probably why I shouldn't have, but it was fun :) The picture was done by [JamieHasCatEyes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JamieHasCatEyes/pseuds/JamieHasCatEyes).

Smaug crawled carefully along the ledge he had hidden himself on, knowing that his intended victim had no clue he was there. He was, of course, a Mighty Hunter who could take down a whole cow all by himself and the rest of the world would know that soon enough. OK, so maybe not a whole cow just yet, but in a year or so definitely. His big brothers had to be wrong: he was not a pipsqueak who would never amount to anything and he was just about to prove it to them. His chosen victim had absolutely no idea he was there, but that was the way he liked it.

His father had taught him how to hunt just a little while ago and Smaug had taken to it quickly, making his first kill – a large and very dangerous pig – on the first try. His brothers had been unimpressed, but Smaug knew that they hadn’t made a kill on their first try, so that proved it, right? He was a much better hunter than his big brothers and was therefore going to be world famous one day.

“There goes Smaug the Mighty Hunter,” people would cry as he flew by. They would throw him food so he did not have to hunt, but he would turn it all down.

“I have no need of your food,” he would tell them gallantly. “I can hunt my own by myself!”

All the Men and Elves and Dwarves would be very impressed with Smaug the Mighty Hunter, of course, but he would brush their praise aside. He had no need for the words of Men and Elves and Dwarves because dragons were above all of that. Why would a dragon need to hear words of praise from a lesser species?

He refocussed on his prey when he heard a twig snap below him. Stretching his neck out from the tree he had climbed, Smaug had to resist the urge to laugh: this was going to be too easy. His victim was standing directly below him, their head turning this way and that, obviously looking for something. Smaug knew exactly what his victim would find, but it would not be what they had been looking for. Spreading his wings as far as he could as he launched himself from the tree, he puffed smoke out from his nostrils in an attempt to scare his prey.

“Die, evil scum,” he yelled as he landed on the scales of his mother’s back. “I am Smaug the Mighty Hunter and I will slay you!”

“Oh, Smaug, what are you doing?” His mother turned her head to nip at his shoulder.

“I am taming the beast that has been rampaging across the countryside! I am protecting the defenceless! I am–”

His words were cut off as his mother managed to get a grip on the scruff of his neck, raising him high in the air, his wings and legs flailing in the air. “You are coming home right now, young man. You have to clean up for tea because your grandmother is arriving soon.”

“But mu-u-u-u-m,” Smaug the Mighty Hunter wailed, but it was to no avail. Even Mighty Hunters apparently had to listen to their mothers every once in a while.


End file.
